1st Class Pork Pie

Dizzy phoned from London last night. "Are you in bed" ? she enquired. Being a 'Yummy Mummy' is hard work. Rigorous regular excercise, 5 pieces of fresh fruit a day, plenty of water, zilch wine. Oh yes, getting in my beauty sleep is very important.

"THE WEDDING OF THE YEAR, has finally taken place" she announced breathlessly. For a moment I felt quite befuddled. Surely even I in the depths of rural France, sans television, head buried deep into my computer for days on end could not have missed this one ? Just because we are an hour ahead in France you think we know it all. Suddenly the penny dropped. Dizzy's baby sister. "Did Hello magazine put in an appearance" ? I asked.

It might have slipped my mind temporarily that I had sadly missed 'the social gathering' but I'm not so daft as to recognise that there is something rather fishy going on surrounding Mon Frere Jumeau's Pork Pie. Why for example when you google 'Worlds Best Pork Pie' would my humble musings appear ? slot 1, page 1. Why indeed ?

In the end though I wasn't going to stand for all these people gawping at his pork pie on my blog. I phoned him up pronto and spoke firmly to his answering machine. "Stop this nonsense at once or else you will be asked to come and be my resident chef at Le Chateau for the summer".(no wages).

Honestly, he must think I was born yesterday.

"Put that in your Pork Pie" I added for extra effect.