That four letter word ....

Mindful that I have a position to maintain running a respectful establishment for clientele of discerning tastes I limit my use of that four letter word to a minimum.

I have noticed that it does seem to be cropping up rather frequently on programmes way before the watershed and appearing almost daily in the papers. Being naturally conversant and eloquent in my speech, expressive even, and well versed I have little or no need to liberally sprinkle my conversation with it.

However I am no saint and even my patience can be tested to the limit. Imagine this. Clients turn up to Le Chateau, I have toiled all day so that it is beautiful for their arrival, floors are polished, a welcome pack of local culinary delights await them. A serious Camembert de Campagne sits silently oozing in the fridge alongside the chilled bottle of local Limoux Crémente,(think seriously nice bubbles).

I greet them having hurriedly applied a bit of essential lippy and a fresh frock (what a nice old fashioned girl). One of them looks at me in a perplexed manner. 'We read your blog' he states. Oooh er I'm thinking, smile or serious to wrap around face right now ? 'Well how kind' I reply 'I do hope it makes you smile', only somehow this one's not smiling. 'You don't mention the **** in it do you' ? he queries. Well why the **** would I? I think but am too utterly polite to say so. 'We don't get an awful lot of **** down here so why mention it ?

I then launch into descriptive mode on the beauty of the surrounding countryside, the richness of the flower and fauna, the fatness of the grapes hanging lushly on the vines, the beauty of the masses of sunflowers huddling together as far as the eye can see, the diversity of this region of the Languedoc, and for all this I say, you need the ****

And then a miracle takes place for the clouds part and the rays of the sun filter down some real July heat and their faces begin to wreath in smiles.

It's just I guess no-body visits Sally'sChateau to read about the rain ?