Blogging from Bridport - Day 13
The cast:
Me
'The Undertaker' (husband)
'On the ground in France' (son)
'Office darling' (daughter)
'Nearly 90' (mother)
From my sluttish vantage point, (the downstairs sofa in the front room) I see life go by. I see a lot more than I care to admit. In a previous life I was a very observant person, sometimes 'The undertaker' and I have competitions in the art of observation, sometimes I let him win.
Yesterday necessitated in a trip to Waitrose. There were two other people in the entire shop, we knew both of them. This puts paid to our 'spot the weekender/second home owner game. I was doing 'nearly 90's' shopping and he was doing his Mother's, along with a few necessities for ourselves. A bunch of tulips in vivid colours were reduced down to .39p from £8. Before I wouldn't have dreamt of buying such a garish bunch of flowers but now they have been awarded top spot in the window.
Before lock down our street would be a busy affair as people jostled for spaces to park, one in, one out, immediately. Now it is an oasis of calm. No-ones car is moving because its permit only. As I pay £70 a year for the privilege to park near where I live this sits nicely into my way of thinking instead of doing battle on a daily basis when you want to unload. But now there's nothing to unload, I've stopped shopping by car. We simply don't need it, and furthermore we're learning to live without it. Bloody marvellous.
The art of distraction and annoying your friends must surely be reaching its peak. Who knew a bottle opener riding a roller coaster could be so entertaining? or other comic sketches which we wont expand on, shared via social media. Once where the elite posted up pictures of far flung and exotic holiday locations its all sourdough bread and puff pastry porn now.
'Nearly 90' has accused me of losing her favourite nightshirt whilst doing her washing. Yesterday i got so exasperated I wagered a £5 bet she would find it, so sure was I that she was losing the plot I upped it to £20. 'Found your nightshirt yet'? I laughingly said this morning. 'No, you've got it' she replied. I was so hopping mad by this time I strode straight out into the garden in my night attire regardless of the chill on the air to rummage through the shed where the washing machine is situated. I picked up the black washing bag in exasperation and my heart sank right down to my suede and fleece lined slippers. What had I ever done in a previous life to deserve this? Racing to the bathroom I run a lavish hot bath filled with L'Occitane foaming bath mousse enriched with organic verbena extract from Provence. To be on the safe side in case its sparkling notes didn't deliver the relaxation it promised I lit a Stoneglow candle called Water flower and White woods. All recent birthday presents for the woman with everything...(sic)
'The undertaker' solemnly handed me a neatly ironed string of Tibetan prayer flags this morning. 'Why would i need these'? I ask bewildered. He doesn't say anything, just turns his back to me and carries on with his packed lunch. (Ham, cottage cheese and salad sandwich, banana, peanut packed protein bar with chocolate). No crisps allowed.
I have been thinking of ways I could help. 'Office darling' is raring to make her mark somewhere, however small, but I feel useless. Annoyingly I can't do an awful lot despite being DBS cleared as I am classed as 'at risk' health wise. I could write to people who are isolated and not on the internet, its an idea.
Meanwhile 'The undertaker' is observing an 'incident' outside involving two police vans.
All because people are incapable of staying home. Pathetic.
It does however notch him up another 'win' on the 'observation from our window competition'.
Before lock down our street would be a busy affair as people jostled for spaces to park, one in, one out, immediately. Now it is an oasis of calm. No-ones car is moving because its permit only. As I pay £70 a year for the privilege to park near where I live this sits nicely into my way of thinking instead of doing battle on a daily basis when you want to unload. But now there's nothing to unload, I've stopped shopping by car. We simply don't need it, and furthermore we're learning to live without it. Bloody marvellous.
The art of distraction and annoying your friends must surely be reaching its peak. Who knew a bottle opener riding a roller coaster could be so entertaining? or other comic sketches which we wont expand on, shared via social media. Once where the elite posted up pictures of far flung and exotic holiday locations its all sourdough bread and puff pastry porn now.
'Nearly 90' has accused me of losing her favourite nightshirt whilst doing her washing. Yesterday i got so exasperated I wagered a £5 bet she would find it, so sure was I that she was losing the plot I upped it to £20. 'Found your nightshirt yet'? I laughingly said this morning. 'No, you've got it' she replied. I was so hopping mad by this time I strode straight out into the garden in my night attire regardless of the chill on the air to rummage through the shed where the washing machine is situated. I picked up the black washing bag in exasperation and my heart sank right down to my suede and fleece lined slippers. What had I ever done in a previous life to deserve this? Racing to the bathroom I run a lavish hot bath filled with L'Occitane foaming bath mousse enriched with organic verbena extract from Provence. To be on the safe side in case its sparkling notes didn't deliver the relaxation it promised I lit a Stoneglow candle called Water flower and White woods. All recent birthday presents for the woman with everything...(sic)
'The undertaker' solemnly handed me a neatly ironed string of Tibetan prayer flags this morning. 'Why would i need these'? I ask bewildered. He doesn't say anything, just turns his back to me and carries on with his packed lunch. (Ham, cottage cheese and salad sandwich, banana, peanut packed protein bar with chocolate). No crisps allowed.
I have been thinking of ways I could help. 'Office darling' is raring to make her mark somewhere, however small, but I feel useless. Annoyingly I can't do an awful lot despite being DBS cleared as I am classed as 'at risk' health wise. I could write to people who are isolated and not on the internet, its an idea.
Meanwhile 'The undertaker' is observing an 'incident' outside involving two police vans.
All because people are incapable of staying home. Pathetic.
It does however notch him up another 'win' on the 'observation from our window competition'.
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